Life in a Fish Tank

In a previous post, I mentioned that I'm reading Mark Nepo's The Book of Awakening. Today was day 9, a story about some fish. Nepo tells the story of a man who needed to clean his fish tank. In order to do so, he filled the bathtub with water, put the fish in the tub, and commenced to clean the tank. When the man went to retrieve the fish from the tub, he was surprised to see that instead of spreading out and swimming the length of the tub, the fish had huddled together in a spot about the size of the fish tank. While I'm sure that there is some very logical scientific reason for this, that is not the point of the story. The point that I take from this story is that while we all live in a world of infinite possibilities, we often stay in the "fish tank". There are a number of reasons to stay in that tank -- that is where the people you love are, it is safe in the tank, and you have the things you need in the tank.

About 3 years ago when I decided to cram my life into two suitcases and see the world, I had no idea what I was getting into. The only thing I knew for sure was that I didn't want to live in the tank anymore. That said, as I reflect on the decisions that I've made, I'm beginning to wonder if I didn't just trade one tank for another. A year ago I lived on the beautiful island of Isla Mujeres, Mexico. I have friends there that I love more dearly than my own life. As my job there was coming to a close I made the decision to move back to another island that I knew well and where I could get a good job. Before I made this decision, I had dreams of backpacking and living on the fly. Those dreams didn't materialize. Instead I went back to the comfort of the tank. I try not to have regrets, but I do. It's not easy to get away from those ideas that we are told from day one -- you have to have a job, you have to have money, you have to have a roof over your head, you have to have 3 square meals a day, etc... Don't get me wrong, I like having those things, I just wonder if maybe we all swam a little further out we could learn to have those things in a different way. And maybe, we could also have the adventure of our lives. The jury is still out, but I feel those backpack dreams coming back, and I'm starting to feel ready to swim a little further from shore.

The Book of Awakening

I just recently ordered Mark Nepo's "The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have". I'm not really big on spiritual books as they usually feel a bit too preachy or too touchy feely for me. I was hesitant to pick this one up, but I'm going through one of those life moments when I feel like I need guidance. Well, I am two days into Nepo's daybook, and already I am feeling like this was a good investment. When I read today's words of wisdom, they hit me like a ton of bricks. In day two, Nepo tells a story of man who is going to paint a room. He goes to the store and buys everything he needs. He mixes the paint outside and picks up all the things he needs to paint the room. He's ready to head inside with his arms loaded down and he can't get the door open. Instead of putting down his load, he struggles with the door and his load. Eventually he falls over and is covered in red paint. The wisdom: What are you carrying around that is preventing you from opening your door? Whether it is the door to love, to success, to financial stability, we all have baggage. I had never looked at this baggage as being an actual hindrance to opening the door I am so doggedly trying to go through. Sure, these things get in the way, but I just assumed they were taking up space inside, not keeping me outside. Whatever the case may be, the question still stands: What are you holding on to that is keeping you from opening the door? Now Nepo doesn't just leave it there, because he understands that some of this stuff is stuff we need. We don't want to put down a healthy dose of fear, and we don't want to leave all of our expectations outside to whither in the grass. So, he offers this simple formula: Prepare what you need, put it down, open the door, and take in only the things that are necessary. It sounds so simple, but we all know how difficult this can be. It's like going into the grocery store when you're hungry. You end up with a whole lot of stuff that you don't want/need, and that make it really difficult to get out of the car and into the house. After the story, Nepo offers a meditation for working on putting down the bags. I'm thinking with a little practice that I may be able to put down some of my own bags. I can't wait to see what day three in this gem of a book has to offer.

S. Korea Day 2: A Day in Daejon

It’s Day 2 in S. Korea and we’re headed to Daejeon. These are O’s old stomping grounds. We make a superfast jump on the KTX, S. Korea’s high speed train system. A first class seat is a little pricey, but it was nice to have a seat by the window. There wasn’t much to see though, buildings and concrete mostly. We landed in the center of downtown. Though there were still piles of snow on the ground, it seemed a few degrees warmer in Daejeon, which was great for me. Our first stop was a cute coffee spot, The Mill, for lunch. The place was run by the cutest Korean couple. With a nice selection of sandwiches, teas, and coffees, I could see this being a regular hang out spot. And, added bonus, they serve ice cream with all the sandwiches. How cool is that?! After that we attempted shopping, albeit very halfheartedly. We wandered around a bit, visited a friend of O’s, and tried to think of what else we could do in Daejeon during the day. Nightlife is pretty hoppin’ in S. Korea, but during the day it’s pretty quiet. We finally decided to hit up a jimjilban, the biggest in Daejeon. O had been wanting to take me to one, as he said it was essential to experiencing S. Korea. So, here’s the set up: You begin at the cashier. It costs anywhere from $5-7 to get in. After you pay you receive a locker key, a uniform (t-shirt/shorts), and a towel. Your first stop is your shoe locker to drop off your shoes, and and then you head to the sauna. At the sauna you go to your other locker. It is also the place where all the naked people are. Now let me explain. The saunas are separated by gender, so I didn’t see all of the naked people in the jimjilban, just all of the naked females. Now, if you have never been in a huge locker room setting, this can be a little daunting. Even more daunting is the fact the you (well me) are literally the only brown girl in the joint. It took me a minute to adjust. So, when I got to my locker and began to undress, I meticulously folded every piece of clothing as I went along, even my socks. The closer I got to exposing myself, the more meticulous I got. Finally, standing in my skivvies staring at my neatly folded clothes, and beating myself up for not shaving my legs, I just said screw it and got down to the birthday suit. I did my best to cover up with the strip of towel I had been given and headed off to the showers. You have to shower before you can enter the hot rooms. O had briefed my before we went into this deal since no one around would speak English, and he wouldn’t be there to help. In our briefing he had mentioned something about communal soap, but all the ladies I saw had their own. When I finally jumped into the next free shower I wasn’t really sure what to do. With all those naked bodies in such close proximity, it did not feel right to have a “look around” to find any soap. Lucky for me someone had left behind a container of something. I stole a few squirts of soap, scrubbed up as best I could, and got the hell out of there. I was so happy to have my uniform on. Now the next step, the hot rooms.

All jimjilbans have common areas with hot rooms. The temperatures range from 68c – 80c. There is also a big area with mats, a place to get water, an ice room, and a snack counter. This jimjilban had a waterfall wall, and a floor with themed rooms. There was also a room temperature room with a weird animal displace case and green lights. There are sleeping caves in jimjilbans for people who want to overnight. It’s certainly cheaper than getting a hotel. After meeting back up with a squeaky clean O, we started our sweat session in a room that was 72c. It was nice and toasty. We moved up to 78c next, and I finally started to work up a sweat. After a nice nap in the green light room, we headed back to 72c. After a couple hours of sweating and napping it was time to hit the showers again. Maybe it was the heat, or maybe the second time around is not a big deal, but when I hit the shower room this time, I did not care. I bought a nice red ginger scrub and a scrubby towel from the soap counter and hit the showers like a pro. When I finally walked out of the jimjilban I felt clean and refreshed. It was awesome, and I can’t wait to do it again. We ended the night at an odenbar run by a friend of O’s known as big Perm. An odenbar is a place where you got to drink fish broth and eat cheese or chicken on a stick. Oh, and drink. It sounds a little funky, but it’s actually quite nice. Not to mention that Perm is one of the sweetest guys on the planet. A few hours and a few beers later we took a less expensive train back to Cheonan. Another awesome day.

S. Korea Here I Come!

Over the next few days I'll be posting about my recent trip to South Korea. I hope you all enjoy the pics and the ramblings :)

Through rainbows, through clouds and sky, over oceans and Japan with is velvet green peaks, and here I am, a 30 year old woman from middle-of-nowhere South Carolina, sitting in an airport in Seoul, South Korea waiting on one of my dearest friends to come and show me around. It’s New Year’s Eve, and all I want to do is sleep after the long journey. Lucky for me, my buddy O is also up for an early night. We take a bus from Seoul to Cheonan (which is where he lives). The trip isn’t too long, and the heat on the bus is working. I am in awe at seeing snow on the ground. It has been almost 4 years. We take a taxi from the bus station to O’s neighborhood. He has a cute one room apartment with a heated floor (Ah, bliss!). O tosses up some celebratory black bean quesadillas for our New Year’s Eve dinner. We also have some fancy soju (Korean drink of choice) to toast the ringing in of 2011. I would have to say my first night in S. Korea is a success.

Woohoo!

I am doing a major happy dance today because I just found out that my poem, Baobab, is going to be published in the PoetryArk anthology. And, to add to the publication news, I have 4 poems coming out in an anthology in the spring. And, if you follow my column on The Coil Review, look for a new article soon. It's good to be in print!

Finally, some traveling!

This past week I had the delight to experience some of what South Korea has to offer and to catch up with a wonderful old friend. I'll be posting some of my experiences here in the cominig days. Until then, I hope that you all had a wonderful new year. I spent the time leading up to 2011 cleaning up my house and making my goals. I'm not much for resolutions, but I believe in making some very clear goals for the new year. If you haven't sat down and thought about what you want 2011 to bring, there is no time like the present. Ask! Believe! Receive!